Have been trying for quite some time to finish up a book that I bought and I successfully managed to do it last night.

The Book: The Bastard of Istanbul
Author: Elif Shafak


"The Bastard of Istanbul," set in the United States and Turkey, concerns two families — one Turkish, living in Istanbul and the other Armenian, divided between Tucson, Arizona and San Francisco.

The Bastard of Istanbul refers to 19-year-old Asya, a rebellious young Turkish woman who simply adores Johnny Cash's music. She lives in a household with her mother and aunts and her only uncle has emigrated to America. Her uncle's Armenian-American stepdaughter, Armanoush, sneaks off to Istanbul to learn more about her Armenian past. Asya and Armanoush become good friends, intrigued by each other's culture.

The family this young woman encounters is a confusing swirl of four generations of women that includes a great-grandmother suffering from Alzheimer's disease; a disapproving, distant and angry grandmother; her four daughters; and one great-granddaughter. The eldest daughter is a self- styled Muslim mystic; another is a high school teacher, and yet another a schizophrenic. The youngest runs a tattoo parlor and has an illegitimate daughter, the bastard of the novel's title.

The story like a roller coaster ride has its up's and downs and results in a secret hat links the two families pasts, tracing back to the 1915 Armenian deportations and massacres.

I loved the wry humor and the social observations, as well as the author putting the personal lives of her people in a larger political tableau.

The one thing that you cannot miss about the book is that it truly describes life..its complications. That is how I have known my life to be.. full of entangles and complications.

The characters in The Bastard of Istanbul are so alive they leap off the page to sit beside you on the couch. What women! Brave ones, silly ones, intellectuals and dopes.

Right now after reading the book my mind is clogged with so many questions-

What if we learn brutal truths about our families’ pasts? What if we learn about the atrocities from which we are all descended? Are we victims? Are we perpetrators? Aren’t we all suffering the consequences? Once we gain knowledge of the truth of our past, what should we do with that knowledge?

Grrrrrrrr......wish I had the answers to it..

Will try figuring out the answers..Till then in the words of the lead character of the book..

"Whatever falls from the sky above, thou shall not curse it..That includes the rain..."

P.S. Do let me know about any good books that you would suggest me to read.Thanks!!

Love Hurts

surrounded by a battalion of adversaries, most of whom he thought were his kins.. he was the lone warrior.. although looking at him one could think so.. but it was not a fight for surivival.. his desparation was more out of his ambition to emerge as a winner.,


for she had promised him that she'd be his prize if he won this.. she, on whom he had his eyes set even as he was fighting.. she, who stood there on the hill and watched him fight.. she, to whom he looked for support, for strength.. for inspiration..and she kept it all away from him.. the only inspiration he gathered was an illusion of his heart.. his heart, where he thought she still lived..but what was he to to know was that she'd already chosen to walk out of it..nd she'd already covered miles.. away from him..from where he was fighting, all he could see was her.. then he saw her walk away..and a sword pierced through his heart.. smoothly sliding its way through..he fell on his knees.. his eyes still fixed to where she stood.. his head bowed down.. his eyes closed.. and the years passed by his eyes.. all the times they'd spent together.. the walks, the talks.. the thoughts.. everything..


A tear fell on the blood soaked earth.. it was tired.. it'd been waiting too long to travel this mile.. and this journey to the warmth of the earth was all that was needed to wash the pains away..he couldnt die.. thats what she'd wished for..he stood up and continued his battle.. with a bleeding heart..he won his battle.. but lost his heart.. perhaps lost his life..ud say whats her side of the story..??she'd wanted him to understand.. understand everything that she did..and he had understood.. he'd understood everything she'd done..but nature taught him one BIG lesson..


whom u love the most, hurt you the best..!!

The Sins

Its probably the first time ever that I realise this...through all of these 6 years that I ve been working and lived through new shades and seasons of life..I ve parted with something that I may never regain...my innocence.Its strange how for winning in a race,I never paused to think of what I have left behind forever.

My values have changed,I have imbibed arrogance,even a tinge of manipulation or diplomacy
And now I yearn to go back to my roots.I want to go back to being a simple vulnerable guy who was capable of crying when it hurt.A child who's innocence shone right through his face.
A man who viewed world in just two hues,black or white,right or wrong,moral or immoral. I know the line between the two blurs as we grow up with realities of everyday life.Come to think of it,I didnt even go through transient phase of dilemma, the transition just happened.
I learnt the rules of survival pretty quick.

Everything around is available for 'exchange',everything is quantifiable,there's a cost benefit analysis preceding every decision of mine.I think solely in terms of my gain,my pleasure.
And yet there's no sense of guilt even though I have almost put a price tag on my body and soul while chasing materialism shamelessly.Rationality has superceded my emotionality...I ll keep in touch with a friend only if he/she does,otherwise am as busy as he/she is.And yet being part of this multitude,I dont miss friendship.I miss love though.
Even though my faith has dwindled and I ve witnessed enough infidelity,there's something that makes me want to believe in fairy tales,in virtues of trust and committment...you know the kind of romance that is practically unheard of these dayse,one that survives years of separation and distance and is still flaming.

I want to distill my soul, wipe away the blemishes,undo the hurt and rekindle the faith.I dont want to be soaked in succulence of momemtary pleasure,that gives me an illusion of being sucked up inside a black hole,like a flight into the unknown,where even if I grople for truth,I wont find any.

Can I go back to being untouched?Untarnished?Unadulterated?Unhurt by toxic veracity...can I free myself??

Reality of LIfe



What is this life if, full of care,
We have no time to stand and stare.

No time to stand beneath the boughs
And stare as long as sheep or cows.

No time to see, when woods we pass,
Where squirrels hide their nuts in grass.

No time to see, in broad daylight,
Streams full of stars, like skies at night.

No time to turn at Beauty's glance,
And watch her feet, how they can dance.

No time to wait till her mouth can
Enrich that smile her eyes began.

A poor life this if, full of care,
We have no time to stand and stare.

......W.H. Davies

Save the Girl

While going through my blog list came across post by noted writer Shobhaa De about the death of female child..by the hands of their own mother and grand mother..


Reasons:
1. Husband did not want them to come back home with a girl child
2. Grandmother stated that she was sure the babies would suffer from deformities after coming out of the incubator, so, in any case their lives were worthless.

Ghastly and heinous crimes in the eyes of many of murdering some one. But actually who is responsible the mother who committed or the husband or grandmother who made her commit this crime.

Perhaps its none of them but us. A helpless society who raises "hue and Cry" about the situataion when its over. Had there been an awareness and help for such mothers..am sure none of the mothers would have actually done it..

Till that time we need to accept this harsh reality
that its lack of efforts from our end..that has resulted in such a heinous crime..

Here is my small beginning from me to raise an awareness about such crimes..Step in and lets make a collective effort to stop this..

Read the full article at: Can it get worse?

Things you should Know



1. I'm suffering from a semi-minor bout of writer's block. It seems like I'm busy juggling all aspects of my life and can't find the time or space to write or really think about everything.

2. Busy with the job. It's nothing close to what I've done these last 6 years and honestly, that's why I took it up(well maybe not). It's different, I've got a lot to learn and it's OK, so all's fine for now.

3. Thought on my mind: Newton's law states, for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction. If you push against something, it pushes back with the same force. The more you struggle, the more your struggles are futile. Guess could see the silver lining..

4. My brain is stuck writing just this post. I mean, seriously, it's a list, an update of sorts. And I can't even get it down?

5. All right, so really? I don't think I can handle thinking too much (or over-analyzing) right now because my life is requiring more emotion from me than it has in a long time, and that makes me extremely vulnerable, and it's dangerous for a vulnerable D to over-analyze and obsess and tune in to his fears and worries. So, for the sake of, you know, my freaking sanity, I'm trying with all my might to be normal about this.

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